You're in a dark alley, with no weapon in hand

[RazorStar 4,025]

The only person you have with you is an NFL player as a bodyguard. Who would you choose to protect you? (Because all Dark Alleys are crawling with thugs and criminals obviously)

 

I'd go with Calais Campbell, dude is big, he has an intimidating face, and he has one of those voices that makes you regret everything you've ever done up to this point in life. What about you guys?

[BwareDWare94 723]

Pat McAfee

[CampinWithaMissingPerson 2,025]

Yeah Calais sounds straight out of a PIxar Monsters Inc movie.

 

I was gonna say Chandler Jones because roids hookup with his bro, but then I remembered the synthetic weed and all around being a dumbass so he'd probably fail to show up that night because he got lost in his bathtub or something. So I'll go with James Harrison.

 

LIKE A MAN https://www.instagram.com/p/49YZiopFjp/

 

Plus he's like 37 now so he's got some wisdom and experience and of course; old man strength. Which we all know trumps youngin' strength.

[FartWaffles 1,857]

 

He just retired, so I don't know if this counts. Gotta go with Jared Allen.

[Sarge+ 3,436]

Gronk. He has that kind of demeanor where nobody would pick a fight with him. Plus we would go to a bangin' party afterwards.

Edited July 24, 2016 by Sarge

[Cherry 1,302]

 

A'Shawn Robinson would make a common criminal shit themself.

Edited July 24, 2016 by Chernobyl426

[BC 331]

 

 

 

 

 

Honorable mention:

1. Vontaze Burfict

2. Aaron Donald

3. Kam Chancellor

 

 

Edited July 24, 2016 by BC

[CampinWithaMissingPerson 2,025]

No ones presence is touching James Harrison's presence I'm sorry. Don't care how big or buff dudes are, some people just have that fire inside and people know it and don't dare put their hand near it. He has it.

[oochymp 2,393]

is Aaron Hernandez an option or are we sticking with active players?

[ATL_Predator+ 1,196]

Steve Smith. Lots of people underestimate size. Don't matter when you have the mentality of a junkyard dog.

[ATL_Predator+ 1,196]

 

A'Shawn Robinson would make a common criminal shit themself.

 

If you know anything about A'Shawn, he's not a terrifying mean dude. He's actually pretty funny and joking...this would not work outside of his appearance.

[Cherry 1,302]

 

If you know anything about A'Shawn, he's not a terrifying mean dude. He's actually pretty funny and joking...this would not work outside of his appearance.

 

You picked a guy who is 5'9" and 185 pounds because he is scrappy. I picked a guy who is 6'4" and 320 pounds because he is huge and intimidating as fuck. Come on ATL.

[ATL_Predator+ 1,196]

 

You picked a guy who is 5'9" and 185 pounds because he is scrappy. I picked a guy who is 6'4" and 320 pounds because he is huge and intimidating as fuck. Come on ATL.

 

Your basic logic blinds you, young Cherry.

[Cherry 1,302]

 

Your basic logic blinds you, young Cherry.

I'll have A'Shawn turn Steve Smith into a stain on the concrete.

[Cherry 1,302]

Except that part where NFL players have gone on to fight MMA and do well due to insane athletic gifts

[Cherry 1,302]

[FartWaffles 1,857]

I never saw this and dont know what its from myself though

Shame on you!