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What's up guys. I haven't been around as much lately. Life has just been busy. This is probably going to be a long post for the record... bear with me. I don't know what to say about this year in general. You look at the way the world is going and the division, stupidity, ignorance and hatred... it's everywhere. Everywhere I go, everywhere I look, it seems that things are providing for a dark future. Personally, I can say this has been the toughest year of my life. I've always been a distant person.. but I feel like someone or something is trying to keep me down for no apparent reason. Here's some things that have happened this year... - I finally got out of the military in Dec of last year. I got tired of their BS and broken promises. I went to state representatives and Senators and spoke with them of how my contract was not being honored in terms of benefits, pay, and reimbursement. I go the whole 'We will look into it, thank you for you concern' BS. Long story short. I said I wasn't showing up to any military functions until it was taken care of, I stopped drilling for 2 years. They gave me an other than honorable discharge which I expected and am w/e with. In my contract their is at least nearly 100k of money that they owe me, and now they are saying I owe them money. Like.. wtf. I did my time honorably the first 3 years, but enough is enough. Not getting paid for drilling, not being fed while at drill... I was losing money left and right. - My best friend of 15 years committed suicide. She was a sister to me. This girl was abandoned by her Russian parents and essentially left for dead on a Port Authority Dock. My family took her in. We went to school together, helped her with learning English.. you name it we did it. This past summer.. we went through all the BS it is anymore to get a passport. We got it so that she could meet her siblings who found her through the internet. She went there. She had just graduated from PSU with a nursing degree and started her job, but was fired because a supervisor said the only way she would gain more respect is if she slept with him essentially. She said fuck no, reported him and in the end they both were fired. She had a kid and her own place... so she applied everywhere. Ended up working with a gas company as a administrative person. Long hours away from her friends and especially her son. I hadn't heard or really seen much from her in a few days so I stopped by her house. Knocked on the door and there was nothing but her car was home. I figured she might be sleeping until I looked down and on the doormat was a suicide note. I work in law enforcement so I called some people before going in and we then walked in and she was on the floor. I've never felt so sick in my life. I've never felt so empty... there simply isn't words. -In the past two months. I have been in two car accidents that have not been my fault. The first one a guy blew a stop sign and hit and spun me at 55 mph. I went to the hospital and they said I had a concussion and whiplash. I didn't have a car for a while but I also have a truck so I wasn't too concerned about having a vehicle. Until.. I walk out one morning and it won't start. Not a battery. Just the whole electrical system is fucked. So I borrowed my gf's jeep for a while which ran well. Literally 2 weeks ago my car got repaired, last night... my gf and I were going out to dinner. Sitting at a red light and waiting to turn left. Light turns green. I turn left, there's a car in front of me, behind me and there's a wall of snow on my right. This minivan backs out of an alley and hits me. Hits me in my rear driver side. The exact same spot my car has been hit TWICE before. The damage is minimal and the car is drivable... however I wouldn't be so upset if the old lady driving had even any sense of where she was or what she was doing. This lady was like 80 years old. I walked up to her and made sure she was ok and she said yeah. Then I asked her if she was calling the police and she said no I'm not calling them I'm calling my husband because YOU hit me. I came so close to breaking her fucking mirror. So I call the police and it takes about a good hour for them to show up. They do all their BS and tell me my reg is expired and that I'm getting a citation for not having it registered. Which is fine, but I literally just got my car back and it expired less than a week ago but these assholes can't give me a warning and instead write me a ticket. Those are just a few of the things going on... I feel defeated. I feel like no matter what I do and how hard I try... things that are out of my control fuck me and I'm over it. Sorry. I just needed to vent.. and was honestly wondering if anyone else feels that life fucks them all the time too.

Idt there is a next McVay. I think if you give Aaron Rodgers a good defense that they're going to contend. Look at what a running game and a defense has done for Brees. The Packers have a good back. They have some pieces on the defensive line but they need some play makers on that side of the ball and a good defensive mind.

Almost put it in the "Y'all are old as fuck" thread I had laying around. Tbf I joined when I was like 15 and now I'm almost 21. I think my odds of being declined would've been significantly higher but now I wish I did.

" Baby, I've looked at the tape and I've come to the conclusion that you have perennial wife talent. The tape doesn't lie. Will you marry me? "

Let's all take a moment and appreciate how old we all are now that cherry's out here getting married.

Proposed to girlfriend last night. She said yes.

Damn, that's fucking rough. Pretty cool that people post on here when they're going through some shit. We're not as active on here as we once we're but it's wild to me the bonds that have been made here. Makes me proud to be a part of this community. I can't offer advice of any kind because I haven't walked in your particular shoes but I think I speak for all us regulars when I say hold ya head up. This storm will pass and TGP will always be here for you.

The 5th one is me. Losing a pet is always tough, it's like getting a piece of your heart ripped out. It's best to just let the grief overtake you, let all your emotions out, and over time you remember all the good times you had with them. I've lost two cats in my life, and both of them were just total sweethearts. I get a little sad when I know that I'll never see them again, but I have so many fun memories about them that it's hard to feel depressed about it. I think I gave them happy times and they certainly made my life better for being in it. Time heals all wounds may be a cliche, but it's only that way because it's true.

There is no good advice in my opinion. Losing anything that meaningful is going to hurt no matter what. One thing I will say is you never regret the moments you spend with something you love. As much time as you can devote to her, do it, it will not be a regret. It may also help to be positively patient with yourself. Realize that it is going to suck and you are going to be hurt, and there is no time table for it. It will take as long as it takes for the grieving process, and there really is no arbitrary measurement for how long it takes to get over it. She truly will be in a better place. Whether that be heaven or not suffering, she will experience peace. She won't be in agony every day. I think we all have a point where suffering is no longer preferable even for those we love. The last thing is remember you were the center of her world. She loved you immensley and love will always stay with you. And do not second guess forgoing chemo. It is not a bad decision. She is going to need you and I have always found that we can learn lessons from death about a life well lived. She will pass with people around who lover and love in her heart. That is something to be revered.